And so My So Called Career Began
And so my “career” began. I started in November of 2006. There were 4 employees in that group. One friend from tax who also moved over. Another young lady who was in the position since we split from another major media company. The Boss (who was my friend), and his secretary who I knew from the Tax Dept because that was the department the Boss started in.l
It all started out nice enough. I wasn’t really being trained because they were still trying To hire a Someone at a higher level than me who I would be reporting to so until then there was no one to train me. Well a few months later a woman was hired and I worked under neath her. I thought she was very smart and I became very insecure immediately because I didn’t know the business at all, and it appeared to be a job that required mostly numbers and numbers are not what I am good at. So between being completely green and not being very proficient in math I felt utterly incompetent in doing my job. I was insecure and I was defensive as a result of it. It seemed like the only time I was was commented on my work was when I did something wrong. Never on anything I did well on. So my defensive's were up high and my attitude was one of anger and self righteous. But deep down I now see it as insecurity. See what happens when you develop a meditation practice? Another story for another day!
Things didn’t get better, in fact they seemed to get worse. More people were hired into the department and as we grew The Boss grew more and more distant, especially with me. Another member of the department was getting divorced at the same time as me. She talked with The Boss a great deal about her divorce and I over heard him say to someone else how sick he is of hearing About it. So I decided right then and there that it was my personal business to get divorced and it wasn’t required that I have to announce it to the entire company. So I told a select few who I consider to be my friends more so than my colleagues.
I think that could have been the driving force that changed the way The Boss felt about me I went into his office one day and closed the door and asked him straight out why he was different towards me. I told him that it could be you’re not happy with my performance and he said no there is nothing wrong. He went off on tangents about how others in the department were pissing him office, which I didn’t care about. I’m asking about me and you. Anyway that was his opportunity to come clean and let me know what changed. His behavior changed for a while but then about a week or so had past and he was back to not saying hello and completely ignoring me so I began to do the same with him. It became a game of cat and mouse maybe? I don’t know.
So between The Boss and The Psycho, I was miserable.
It all started out nice enough. I wasn’t really being trained because they were still trying To hire a Someone at a higher level than me who I would be reporting to so until then there was no one to train me. Well a few months later a woman was hired and I worked under neath her. I thought she was very smart and I became very insecure immediately because I didn’t know the business at all, and it appeared to be a job that required mostly numbers and numbers are not what I am good at. So between being completely green and not being very proficient in math I felt utterly incompetent in doing my job. I was insecure and I was defensive as a result of it. It seemed like the only time I was was commented on my work was when I did something wrong. Never on anything I did well on. So my defensive's were up high and my attitude was one of anger and self righteous. But deep down I now see it as insecurity. See what happens when you develop a meditation practice? Another story for another day!
Things didn’t get better, in fact they seemed to get worse. More people were hired into the department and as we grew The Boss grew more and more distant, especially with me. Another member of the department was getting divorced at the same time as me. She talked with The Boss a great deal about her divorce and I over heard him say to someone else how sick he is of hearing About it. So I decided right then and there that it was my personal business to get divorced and it wasn’t required that I have to announce it to the entire company. So I told a select few who I consider to be my friends more so than my colleagues.
I think that could have been the driving force that changed the way The Boss felt about me I went into his office one day and closed the door and asked him straight out why he was different towards me. I told him that it could be you’re not happy with my performance and he said no there is nothing wrong. He went off on tangents about how others in the department were pissing him office, which I didn’t care about. I’m asking about me and you. Anyway that was his opportunity to come clean and let me know what changed. His behavior changed for a while but then about a week or so had past and he was back to not saying hello and completely ignoring me so I began to do the same with him. It became a game of cat and mouse maybe? I don’t know.
So between The Boss and The Psycho, I was miserable.
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